Sea of Love

What seems like an eternity ago, I saw the movie Sea of Love with Al Pacino and Ellen Barkin. There was a scene where they called each other and agreed to meet at a bodega of all places. She was in a trench coat with nothing on underneath and there was this song playing as she and Pacino went thru this, for lack of a better phrase, mating ritual. It was this song by Sade, Siempre Hay Esperanza, that has always stuck with me as the MOST SEDUCTIVE SONG EVER.

In any event, fast forward to the summer of late July 1994, and I was flying to Cleveland for a hazardous waste conference, and also to meet this boy I had met earlier in the month in Provincetown, MA and I brought one cd with me.

That same Sade CD.

As I said in one of my original posts, the story of how I met this boy and and the subsequent relationship is a lovely story that I'lll post soon.

What's up with Amtrack or what's up with diabetics?

So, I was reading on the CNN this morning on-line an article about an elderly man who was forced off an Amtrack train in the middle of some national park in Arizona because he was acting "rude and disorderly." They haven't found him yet. His family says that he's a diabetic and that he was most likely having an insulin reaction.

Ok folks, first of all-- how in the world could Amtrack have a procedure that involves forcibly removing someone at a drop location in the middle of fucking no where (the man was supposedly about 65 years of age).

And second of all, what diabetic is not going to say or acknowledge that they are in fact a diabetic and something's wrong?

I've been a diabetic now for almost 22 years. I was diagnosed when I had just graduated from college. Yeah it sucks, but it is in fact a very manageable chronic disease. All of my friends know this and have at some point, experienced my saying to them.... I NEED SUGAR NOW !

Not long ago I was at a screening of DreamGirls on the studio lot. They had to stop the movie half way through because a woman went into an insulin reaction and her friend started freaking out. One of the guys in my group was a doctor so he ran over to her, but not before the amazing studio emergency team was there. Within 15 minutes all was well. But the studio didn't make the woman go stand in a corner or in the parking lot for behaving oddly.

I hi-lite these two situations because as a diabetic I have to own my health. I have to own, 24/7 my blood sugar. I've become very aware of my eating, my exercise, my insulin--because I HAVE TO. It's not fun, insurance sucks, but it's my issue.

I was paid a somewhat off handed compliment by a friend of mine a few years ago at of all places, a circuit party in Palm Springs (circuit party: a large dance party with more gay men than you can imagine) who said, ya knowTom, in all the years I've know you and all the events we've been togther, you have never let your diabetes get in the way - at least with us.

Now, this is not to say that there haven't been times when I've been aware that things are happening with my system, it's just that I am so attuned always and that I mentally monitor what's going on and deal with it all whenever I need to.

It's my responsibility, after all.

Ocean's 13

Ok, so a while ago I said that I have always been in love with Enrique Iglesias when I should have said, I've always been infatuated with him-- not unlike a teenage girl.

The man I'm truly in love with is George Clooney. C'mon, who among us isn't enchanted with his charm, brains, looks, his committment to progressive causes, his endeavors to raise awareness about Darfur, and above all else, his keen sense of humor.

So, I liked the movie...

At What Point Does America Wake Up and

Give these jokers the boot? Are there no Republicans with any sense of decency who will come to the aid of the Constitution? What additional part of said Constitution does the Vice President have to tear or shred for them to finally say enough?

Secretary of the Smithsonian

How do I get this job? 70 weeks of vacation over 7 years, doubling of salary, a housing allowance, time off to sit on other company's boards and make millions, is there anything that he didn't get?

Oh, and then get a load of what his secretary made.

Pigs at the trough of public money.

01/20/2009 can't come quick enough.

It's About Time Someone Took Sen. Lieberman To Task

And no better person to do that than Gen. Wesley Clark - go read at The Huffington Post.

An Inconvenient Truth

I want to send an email to my extended family of friends -- why is this man not our President--which is of course a rhetorical question? Granted, I am biased; while I truly think that the John Edwards Campaign best represents what is possible for and in America, I have got to tell you, the moment Al Gore gets in the campaign, the moment I am there.

I spent some time today with one of my closest friends who is as in tune with American politics as I like to think I am; and he noted, somewhat exhaustingly that he is just tired of Gore's voice, ie the whole lockbox repetition. And I, somewhat ambigously said, yeah whatever.

Whatever, NO !

There come's a point in your life when you have to say, ok, there is more than what just affects me.

"Whatever you do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power & magic in it."

by Goethe.

I've had this quote framed with me since 1986. And while I've discarded 99% of the detritus since that time, this has remained. Go figure.

Ok, so I've always been in love with Enrique Iglesias

Go to www.acausedesgarcons.com, I know it's in French and I have no idea what it says, but he has a video posted from YouTube of a live performance of Enrique's. In this video, Enrique is singing to a young man on stage who is obviously just as smitten with Enrigue as I would be. And it's just so nice to see how Enrique performs to this guy. AND it's fantastic how much the crowd loves the whole thing as well.

What a nice fellow this Mr. Iglesias is.

(Go to YouTube and type in Enrigue Iglesias Boy Kiss)

"Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus"

Link to an LA Times article today, 5 June 2007 about Professor David Scholer of Fuller Theological Semindary in Pasadena.

Just a daily reminder of putting things in perspective.

Book Reviews

Once I figure out how this whole process works, I'm going to add a section on book reviews. That's basically what got me started thinking about a blog. I tend to have 6 or 7 books going at the same time and I have friends who've asked me for reading suggestions. I have a wide variety of interests and so it's really kind of fun for me when asked for suggestions.

In any event, I just happened to be going through recipes today - I read the top 4 cooking magazines pretty regularly and cull recipes and put them in page protectors in a 3-ring binder no less (for that some day when I make all of the recipes in one big meal!)- when on the shelf above the cook books was a book by David Sedaris, Me Talk Pretty One Day.

He is one of the wittiest observers of life I have ever read. I just sat down, opened the book to a random page and began reading. Within moments, whether I'd read the stories before, I was chuckling, giggling, and full out laughing as if it all were brand new (maybe the drugs have killed more long term memory cells that I'd like to admit).

My next leap of thought goes to the site Whiskey Fire where there is a guest blogger named VA. And he kind of encapsulates what I'm thinking about all this that is going on in current events.

These are people who communicate thoughts and stories in a manner I wish I could. It is inspiring; Mr. Sedaris being of my generation and from what I can surmise, Mr. VA being of the Generation Z-- what are they calling newbie college grads these days? They are both observant and involved.

Do you remember the game Pong?

You know, that first of all video games where it simulated an across the screen game of either tennis or ping pong? Well, thus is my mind-set; wasn't there some TV routine maybe SNL or Monty Python that leapt to the: On a Totally Different Topic?

Why is that when buying a new car, the script hasn't changed in at least 20 years?

Yesterday I went to a Volvo dealership that I had actually contacted via the internet. Now, one would think that in this day in age, that with the advent of said internet and with the advancement of televised entertainment, that said dealer would contemplate the relative intelligence of the customer.

However, no. There was the whole "Let me go talk to my finance manager" spiel not once, but twice. This after I've told them I don't want to discuss buying right now, that I would willingly fill out the credit applications, knowing my checkered credit history and knowing full well that I'll need either a co-signor or a large cash down payment, yet none the less, we go through this charade.

Soured me once again on that whole process. However, as we know, Los Angeles is all about the car culture so I have to go through with this.

ARGH!!

I've done the whole on-line purchasing of a car - 6 years ago to be exact. And I have to be honest, that experience was amazing. I used CarsDirect.com and would do so again if financing weren't an issue.

Having read the above I realize that the only issues involved are self-imposed and I need to stop with the self-imposed fear.

Oh wait, where's my copy of The Secret???? :)

Mid Life Questions

Now I know the whole idea of a blog is to keep a daily record of whatever it is you want to record, but I took a day off yesterday for health reasons - physical and mental.

On Yahoo today, one of their topics was on, "Is there such a thing as The One, in relationships." I of course had to click through to read the thoroughly inane topic addressed by a female match maker talking about her experiences with straight couples.

And after a cocktail or two, I thought I would comment.

Having been single for the better part of my dating years, I have to admit that there was one time in my life where I thought I had met THE ONE. I'll tell that story another time, but I wanted to note however that the topic comes to light as THE ONE who has more or less haunted my life for the last 10 years (since he dumped me) is now moving (THANK GOD) to another part of the state. I found this out yesterday and while it doesn't really affect me, it kinda did.

So while yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus, yes there does exist THE ONE. I know that I'm being naive and romantic or what -have-you, but I have to tell you, that feeling is a once in a lifetime feeling you don't forget--which sucks at times.

Don't get me wrong, there's a difference between THE ONE and soul mates; I am so blessed with 4 soul mates whom I would never in a lifetime, sleep with-- I couldn't get through this life without them. But they're not that ONE.

How does all this pertain to my header - Mid Life Questions?

I've been doing lot of self examination lately -- career, personal growth, a physical checklist,etc. And in all this, I'm now asking myself that soul searching question of why I even still think about him -- after so many years of not mattering to him? The old adage that actions speak louder than words--or his lack of any actions or thoughts, that I have chosen to so ignore all the while thinking that maybe someday he'd realize that simple friendship with me might be worth something - what is it that I can't just walk away and say, what a colossal waste of time?